I've been bitten...

...by the racing bug. Since signing up for the Rock 'N Roll Half Marathon coming up in just 2 weeks from tomorrow, I've been doing alot of walking and running. Last week, I did my first "official" 5K, getting a shirt and race bib and all. I am BEYOND excited about the RNR Half Marathon, it's just about all I can think about.

Last week I came super close to signing up for the Gasparilla Distance Classic Race weekend in Tampa in March. There was a promotion at Sports Authority, if you spend $85 in Nike running gear, you get free registration for certain events. I knew it would be going on this week as well, so I decided to think about it. Today, after our 11-mile training walk which went FANTASTIC, I decided I would splurge a little and buy some new running gear and get that free registration for the 8K on Sunday March 4. I bought a pair of super cool pants, a pair of shorts, a super light top, and a nifty water belt. I am all set and I will look fantastic doing it!

Super cool event shirt I got for registering for the 8K!

I am so excited about taking the time for myself and making the commitment to do these races. I certainly won't be the fastest or the best, but I will be out there doing it and giving it MY best shot. I am extremely proud of myself for doing this. I CAN DO IT!

Starting over, again.

Today I did what I've been needing to do for awhile. There was no more denying my clothes not fitting like they used to, or my inability to control my appetite and how much I was eating. I needed something to keep me line since I can't seem to do it myself. I went back to Weight Watchers.

There is nothing like getting on the scale knowing it's going to read a number that is higher than you want it to be. Finding out just how high it is is even worse. I am all about being open and honest here on my blog, but for now, I don't want to admit what I weighed in at. It's higher than I've been in many many years and I don't like it. Not. One. Bit.

It's that kind of anger and frustration that I need to get me off my butt and do something about it. And I am the only one who can do it. I am excited about following the new PointsPlus program and see what all it has to offer. I am excited to plan my meals and have that structure that I need to stay on point.

I didn't stop going to Weight Watchers because I wanted to. I stopped going because when I got busy at work and needed every minute I could to do what I needed to and was bringing work home to do in the evenings, the easiest thing to give up to make time for that was my time at WW and working out. All of a sudden, my Friday mornings were spent wherever I had surveys or permitting or customer meetings, so I wasn't able to go to my WW meeting. When I would get home from work, instead of putting on my running shoes the minute I got home and running out the door, I was sitting down at my dining room table to continue to work on whatever I brought home with me. I was also eating whatever was quick and easy. All of this added up to extra pounds for me. Nobody's fault but mine. I didn't like it but I was doing what had to be done. This is where I need to find balance. I work to hard at work to keep things busy and I can't let being busy control my every minute and affect my wellness.

A good friend is doing WW too. I look forward to sharing recipes, thoughts, motivation, and more with her. I also just last night read a post on Colleen Bee Fit's blog about how she just reached her Lifetime weight goal. What an inspiration she is! Her before and after photos are incredible and she is so amazing. I guarantee you when I walked back in to Weight Watchers this morning, I was thinking about her meeting her goal. I want to again feel that excitement of getting to my goal weight and I want to br proud of myself for working my butt off.

It won't be easy. Lord knows my body doesn't respond like it used to. But nothing worth having is easy. It'll be hard to not eat everything in site and have to really limit those glasses of wine I so enjoy. On the flipside, I will enjoy foods that I love and I will be taking better care of myself. In return, I look forward to feeling better not only about how I look, but also about how I feel. I don't like being achy and sore all the time. My body is telling me something. And finally, I am listening. That is a very empowering thing.

I hope you'll follow me on my journey. Any support I can get is important to me and will motivate me to keep plugging away at this, one pound at a time, however long it takes.

Health and Wellness Goals for 2012

Happy New Year! Happy 2012!! I am happy to have a fresh start. Something about a new year that makes me feel like I have a chance to start over and get it right, yet again.

I hate to use the word resolutions, so I am going to use the word goals. I have a few health and wellness-related goals, and what better place to put them then here, where anyone can see them. I am all about accountability, so here goes.

1) Be nicer to myself in 2012. This is a hard one for me. I tend to get mad at my body for the things it can't do and then I don't care what I do to it. Mostly, eating. I love to eat, no surprise there, but I go through phases where I just flat out don't care how much I eat or what I eat. Screw it, I just don't care. Well, as fun as it is at that moment, I CAN'T DO THAT. I am fortunate to like and enjoy a lot of healthy foods and I should really focus on those more than the bad.

2) Do my best to stick to a regular walking/running routine even when I am too busy. This is another downfall of mine. When I get busy and have too much to do, my needs are the first to go. And ususally, any exercise I am currently into at the time goes out the window. It's the easiest thing to give up because I can't give up things like sleep, eat, take care of the dogs, etc... I CAN'T DO THAT. Everyone gets busy and it's hard to fit everything in. I need to lose my all-or-nothing mentality and remember that even if I don't have time for a 3-mile walk, 1-mile would be better than nothing. Over time it all adds up and it is good for my mental health.

3) Lose weight. I am having such a hard time with my weight these days. I'll address the "how much do I need to lose" on a later post. I know metabolism slows down as you get older and I am here to tell you that is true. But I have to find a way to make it work. I can't continue on this path of eating whatever I want, when I want because it tastes good. I CAN'T DO THAT. My short frame is not meant to be this weight. I can feel it, my body aches, and I don't like it. I know over time with proper eating and activity it will respond. It may happen slower than it has in the past, but I am confident that I can lose the weight.

4) Do more walking/running events. After signing up for my first half marathon the other day, I am already thinking about a second one. Yes, I am an over-achiever. I would like to do TWO half-marathons in 2012 and I would like to do THREE 5Ks. Here's the catch.... I want to run two of the 5Ks. I used to be able to run 3 miles at a time and I will get back there. I'm already looking into local events for the year.

5) Read more books. This one is totally non-health related, but it's something I'd like to do so it falls under the wellness category. With my current Kindle Fire obsession, I have plenty to read and I want to work towards a goal of 40 books for the year.

6) Keep up with my blog as regularly as possible. I'm not sure that when people read this they enjoy it as much as I enjoy writing it, but it is so fun for me to do and makes me feel better. It's like my journal, a way to express my feelings and most of all, I can pretend to be a writer. Thank you to all who read this!

What are YOUR goals for 2012?

508 miles in 2011

With my run this morning, on the last day of the year, I can now look back at 2011 and see how

far I walked/ran. My total miles for the year....508.  HOLY COW! Some of it was running, some of it was walking. Many of the higher miles was training with Jenna for the 3-Day. The most miles logged in one month was back in March when I set a goal to walk 100 miles for the month and I did 104. Here's a nifty chart from dailymile on my mileage by month. Not too shabby.

So when I look at this and my total miles, I automatically think "I need to top this in 2012".

I am so darn competitive with myself. So here, for all to see, I am setting a goal of 600 miles

for 2011. That's 50 miles per month. Why not?

It was foggy this morning during my run,  but it was so pretty at the park. A few pictures

I took while there... It was a pretty nice way to end 2011!

Eagle Lake Park   12/31/11

I'm gonna do it!

Earlier in the year I mentioned wanting to do the Rock 'N Roll 1/2 Marathon in St. Pete in February. When I stopped my running / walking routine, I thought that was now just a dream. How could I possibly do it?

I have not stopped thinking about it. Whether I've been running or walking or not in the past few crazy busy months, it has been on my mind. The other night it occurred to me that there is nothing stopping me from doing it. Why not? I must be crazy! This prompted me even more to get off my butt yesterday morning and go running/walking. Even after not doing it for a few months, my time was not awful.

I asked hubby if he thought I could do it and of course he said YES. (thank you honey!) If he thinks I can do it, then I know I can. And having him at the finish line, waiting for me and cheering me on will motivate me even more.

It's 2 weeks after my 40th birthday. I can't think of a better time to do my first 1/2 marathon. I'M GONNA DO IT!!! I may not run the whole thing, but I'll give it my best shot and will feel very accomplished when it's over, whatever my time may be. 2012 is going to be MY year. I'm going to do more things for myself and this seems like a pretty good way to start it.




I'm gonna do it!!

Evil bloated woman is here...

I am skipping my usual BYOC post this week to talk about a different topic. That being weight gain. My usual light-hearted, entertaining, information packed post will be replaced with something far less  fun, but something I want to talk about.

This week has been a weird one. I walked this past Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. I didn't only walk, I ran. I kicked butt and sweat like there was no tomorrow. Then came Tuesday and I was tired. I was achy. My legs hurt. And I was grouchy. At some point that day, evil bloated woman took over my body and I had no say in it. I chose not to run that day, hell I didn't even want to walk. And it didn't take much convincing of myself to not go out. Instead, I did some cleaning when I got home. And I didn't miss the running. I attributed this to the arrival of evil bloated woman. I am over losing control of my body for a few days each month but whatever. Being a girl sucks. Did I mention that I had a couple of adult beverages as well?

Then comes Wednesday and I started the day thinking I would make up for the day before. WRONG. My eating that day was awful. I was on carb overload, consuming everything that is bad for me like there is no tomorrow. I knew it was wrong but I didn't care. Or evil bloated woman didn't care. The line can be very blurred at times. When I got home Wednesday afternoon, I knew I would not be running or walking. Nope, it wasn't going to happen.

This is what I started to feel guilty, but knew that no matter how much guilt I felt, I had no control over the situation. I was bloated and hungry and grouchy and as much as I wanted to not care about being good and getting out there, I really didn't.

Yesterday being a non-workout day for me, I took advantage of it and did just that. I didn't work out. Why would I? I was still grouchy and bloated and being held hostage by evil bloated woman. There was more eating foods that I shouldn't be eating, at least in the quantities I was eating them.

When I got up this morning, I dreaded getting on the scale at WW. For a minute, evil bloated woman tried to convince me NOT to go. But alas, I knew I would go. I had to go, I had to be accountable, no matter how bad it might be. The only thing is, I didn't realize it would be quite so bad.

I got on the scale this morning to see a 3.4 lb. weight gain. I gained exactly the amount of weight that I worked my butt off to lose the two weeks prior. I joked about evil bloated woman when I got off the scale and while I know she played a part in it, I knew that somehow I have to find a way to not let her control me like that and send me into a downward spiral.

I know I will lose that 3.4 pounds, I don't doubt that. I just worry that it'll take me two 2+ weeks to do it and then before I know it, evil bloated woman will be back again trying to trick me into her evil ways again. I have to find a way to keep her from controlling me.

Tomorrow morning I will be walking 13 miles with my sister-in-law for her training for the 3 Day walk. This will be a great start to the new week. I cannot let this get me down, I have to pick myself up and get right back to it. Evil bloated woman be damned.

Bee an inspiration!

One of the blogs I follow is Bee Fit, written by an amazing gal named Colleen. She started her weight loss journey at 272 pounds and joined WW on Feb. 24, 2010 weighing 252.6 pounds. This past June, she made her goal at WW, losing 102 pounds. Her weight loss is AMAZING and her progress photos really show the hard work she has done to get to this point.

But what I love most about her story is her determination. When she reached her 220's, she started jogging. She ran her first 5k in September 2010. Since then she has completed several half marathons and many more 5ks. This is incredible to me. You read so many stories of people who say "when I reach my goal and lose all the weight, I'm going to run a half marathon". Not Colleen. She didn't wait. And I love that. And she's not stopping anytime soon. She just completed another half marathon over the weekend and is training for her first full marathon in November.

The reason I'm telling you about Colleen today, besides the fact that you should all go visit her blog and read for yourself how incredible she is, is to tell you that she inspired me to do something. I read today's blog post while I was eating my lunch. It was about the half marathon she completed this weekend AND set a new personal record for herself. Pretty amazing, huh?

A couple hours later, I read it again. I kept thinking about how incredible I feel to go out and walk 3, 4, 5, even 10 or 11 miles. And then I wondered how incredible she must feel about herself with all she has accomplished. To run a 5k would be a huge thing for me. To run a half marathon? Well, that almost seems out of reach for me but it is something I would love to do and it's a dream I have.

So I was driving home from work, trying to beat the rain clouds so I could get to the park and log my 3.11 miles for the day. On a normal day, I will alternate walking and running - mostly walking with probably a third of it running throughout. A little bit here, a little bit there. I tend to run more near the end as I am trying to make the most of my time, always trying to beat my best time.

Today I decided I was going to run 1 mile - all at once. Colleen's ability to go out and run a half marathon and train for a full marathon inspired me to run the first mile, just to see if I could do it. And I did. It took me 12:02. Not a fast mile by any stretch, but one that was comfortable for me. I DID IT. It felt great and kept me going for the rest of my walk, during which I did more running. As always, I am thankful for my strong legs that allow me to run and push myself.

Another exciting tidbit to mention... I have a new personal best for my 5k - 40:48, beating my previous best by 17 seconds. I am SO competitive with myself.

Now, I know I can run a mile. I'll work on that for a bit and then I'll try 2 miles. And one day you'll read about me running a 5K. Maybe I'll inspire others the way Colleen has inspired me.

Don't forget to check out Colleen's blog Bee Fit . You WILL be inspired.

Running through the tears...

I had a good walk/run today despite the unbelievable humidity. But in typical fashion, the run part of my efforts turned into me into a blubbering, teary-eyed mess. I am not sure why, but it's more common than not for me to cry when I run. I am not a pretty runner or even a good runner, but it's certainly not physical pain prompting my tears.

Between the endorphins that are kicking and just the release I feel in being outside and taking time for myself, I start really thinking about my dad, and on come the tears.

I miss my dad and wish so much that I could talk to him and see him and hug him. I think of him many times, every day, but I am so busy that those thoughts and memories, sadly, tend to get pushed aside in the craziness of my day. But when I am running and I have the miracle of an off-switch for the work stress and more that floods my mind daily, the thoughts of my dad fill my heart and mind.

I am okay with the tears and the thoughts I have of him durning my run. But it sure makes it tricky to see some times. By the time I am done, I am totally d-o-n-e. Worn out and exhausted. I have always said that walking is my therapy and good for my mental health, and for the depression tendencies I naturally have. I believe that even more after I've had a good cry, running through the park. I need that time that I take for myself, tears, thoughts of my dad, and all.

It's like a drug

After a great walk / run last Saturday, I skipped Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday. Sunday got away from me without it happening and Monday and Tuesday were busy work days and I was beat by the time I got home. EXCUSES, I know. By the time yesterday evening got here, I told hubby I HAD to go and walk. It was a necessity. So off I went. And man it felt great.

I set my super cool Nike+ GPS app on my handy dandy iPhone for a 5k and off I went. I had finally loaded some music on my phone and imported it into the app and enjoyed having music in my ears while I walked my little heart out. Back a few years ago, my last time on WW, when I was running alot, I would pick an artist randomly and whenever one of their songs came on, I would run. For yesterday, my artist of choice was System of a Down, what I like to refer to as my rage music. Wouldn't you know, several of their songs played for me so I got some good running in. My heart was pounding and I was a hot sweaty mess but it was great.

I can honestly say that walking / running is like a drug to me. No other exercise has that effect on me. I can be in the worst mood or stressed out or whatever, but when I'm done with my walk, I am a different person. So when I said yesterday that I needed to walk, I meant it.

Having only walked 3 days since my last weigh-in last Friday, we'll see how tomorrow's weigh-in goes. I don't really have any gut feelings on it right now. I've been keeping up with my 64 oz. of water a day which I know has been a big help. We will see tomorrow morning!!

A couple goals to work towards... (and a guest blogger tomorrow!)

It's time I set a few goals for myself, here for all the world to see. Having lost 8.8 pounds in the 7 weeks I've been back on WW, I know that the program does work when I do it. It is hard to be good all the time and I do struggle, but I refuse to deprive myself. One of the great gals in my WW meeting put it perfectly last week. She said it's taken her awhile to lose the weight she has, but it's because she's been busy living. I love that. You have to live and enjoy life and enjoy the events in your life that involve food. Our family gets together at least once a month for family dinners. Sometimes they are at one of our homes, other times they are at a restaurant. Sometimes I will stay on point and sometimes I don't. But that is why we have extra weekly points, not to mention hard-earned activity points. Case in point, we went to Hooters on Easter Sundar for a non-traditional dinner. I chose to have my "usual" and not worry about the points. It was a treat, one that I really enjoyed. It's being able to get back on track that means I will succeed in the long run.

So anyway, back to my goals. Iam losing an average of 1.25 lbs. a week - sometimes it's more, sometimes it's less. I am an overall picture kind of girl. I have a weight that I want to get to and I am happy getting there in due time. Like I've said, I'm not in any hurry.

Weight goals:
June 15th - I would like to be down 16 pounds total - this will put me at my 10% goal
October 15 - I would like to be at my goal weight of 130 and maintaining it, back at lifetime member status

Activity goals:
June 15th - I would like to be able to run 2 miles straight - I am not looking to set record times, just be able to run continuously for 2 miles
October 15 - I would like to be able to run 2 miles a day, 5 days a week

I realize that it is likely I may have less weight to lose than others, just as likely as it is more than others. But it is my feeling that losing weight is all relative. For myself, my short little 5' 3" frame does not do well anytime I get over 145. It affects me physically as well as mentally. It is hard on my legs and feet and I notice that my back is more prone to issues when I am carrying extra weight. 130 is my happy weight. I am most comfortable there. It's hard to get under that number, although I have dipped into the upper 120's a few times before, but it is hard to maintain. I am a very muscular gal.

I am struggling a bit this week with working out. I did not work out on Monday. Yesterday I did my TaeBo Cardio Circuit 2 workout - 53 minutes of sweating my butt off. It's great. I intended to walk today, always working towards my goal of 15 miles a week, but it was so warm here today, I couldn't bring myself to walk outside. The treadmill did not seem the least bit exciting to me so I decided to do TaeBo again. I did it two days in a row last week as well. So, half of my weekly goal has been reached. Two days of TaeBo for the week - done.

I hope you'll check back here tomorrow. I am so excited to have a guest blogger. Her name is Joanna and I love to read her blog. She is an inspiration and has quite a story. She is on a weight loss journey as well and has lost an amazing 86 pounds so far. You can find her over at Diary Of A Mad, Fat Woman . I urge you to read her story and follow her real-life struggles as she works towards her goal. She is amazing!

Strong legs

I caught a glimpse of my legs this morning when I was running. Between the endorphin-rush I was in the midst of and the sun hitting them just right, it occurred to me that I have strong legs. I have worked them hard this week, so far I'm up to 17 miles for the week and I did TaeBo twice.

I am fortunate that my body responds as it does. When I am good to it and treat it right, I get results. Obviously this isn't always an easy thing. Sometimes it's easier to sit on the couch and do nothing or eat junk food. But I am a muscular person and after doing the right exercises, those muscles will show. I'll have the legs that I used to have and the arms and shoulders that I love to show off in tank tops.

I took this picture after my run this morning. They were like jello and I could feel every muscle in them, bitching at me for pushing them so hard this week between walking, running, and TaeBo. After a rest, they'll be ready to go again and will continue to see me through this journey.